Car Journeys With Kids - #CarSeatConundrums

Kiddicare have teamed up with Dr Elizabeth Kilbey, a well known child psychologist to get her views on how to balance the need for safe driving with the need to answer the questions to make sure your child feels safe and doesn’t get upset when they can’t see you. Her view is that often the child is just reaching out for a connection. It’s easy to forget that they can’t really see you, and that they don’t have your attention. To the child they won’t realise you are completing a task that in some situations can be difficult. Often the question doesn’t need a ‘correct’ answer, just an answer so that the child can connect with you. It’s their way of making sure you are still there and still there for them even though you are doing something else.  

Lots of parents in a recent survey by Kiddicare indicated that they felt pressure to answer the question right so that their child didn’t get upset and often, according to Dr Kilbey, this isn’t the case. Dr Kilbey has also worked with Kiddicare to design a flowchart to help parents with the conundrum of the car seat questions.
Having taken some time to look over the flowchart, I can see how for some parents this would be useful. For us, we always use the opportunity of the car drive to have a chat anyway. Sometimes it’s too easy to let the little ones have their devices in the car and then silence descends, so we always make sure that there is lots to talk about (and lots of answers ready) for when we are in the car. 

Both little J and big J come out with us the car each weekend as we head out on our adventures. As you may know big J is 13 and little J is 3 so the amount and type of questions  that come out while in the car are just amazing.  I thought it might be useful to share with you 2 of the questions that we have been asked by both of them recently and let you know how we responded to see if you would have done the same.

Little J "Where are all the Dinosaurs?"
Mummy "They've died, their extinct"
Little J "In Our Sink?"

Little J "Where are we going Daddy?"
Daddy "To pick up Mummy's car"
Little J " Did it fall over?"

Little J  "Why aren’t we going to the park?"
Daddy "Because it’s miserable and also raining heavily"
Little J "Are we going to the park now? "
Daddy "No because it’s still raining"
 Little J "We go to the park later?"
 Daddy "No because you will be in bed later"
 Little J "Ok grandma take me the park later"
Daddy - silence as little J has clearly won this one.

Big J  "Why are we going to Tesco again?" 
Mummy "Because we need food"
Big J "But we went last week"
 Mummy "We have eaten the food we bought last week"
 Big J "Why didn’t you buy more food when we went last week?"
 Mummy "Because it goes off"
Big J "But do we have to go right now?"
Mummy "Yes, otherwise you won't have any dinner"
 Big J "Can't we just go to McDonalds"
Mummy *sighs*
   A typical teenage answer. 

In both of these situations it’s been difficult to come up with a good enough response whilst keeping an eye on the road and the safety of the boys. It’s important that safety is paramount and they are safe, but it’s also important that responses are given, especially with little J who is so curious about everything, and loves to ask questions. 

Have you ever had to answer your little ones whilst driving. We would love to hear the questions and your responses. You can get involved by using the hashtag #CarSeatConundrums



  1. This is a daily challenge for me and I am actually glad I got the read your article. Yes, I get tons of questions fired at me while driving and sometimes, I get quite cross as I need to concentrate while trying to come up with a good answer.xx

  2. My daughter's too young for this to be an issue yet. But I'm looking forward to it and dreading it in equal measure!

  3. I often wonder how parents concentrate in the car when the kids are throwing a million and one questions at them x

  4. interesting, questions do seem to increase in the car!

  5. Oh so many questions... ALL OF THE TIME!

  6. I have this all the time - I try and distract with a game

  7. My son it two and is starting to ask things so it's nice to have an idea what to do.

  8. Great post. I'm not quite sure they ever truly grow out of this fully! It gets better.....I think


Thanks for your comments. I love reading them :)